Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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