This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
