Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
