you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
