Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
