Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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