Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
