after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize
