I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Randomize
