with your own penis?
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
