a queef is a wish your heart makes.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize