ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I supernannyed him into submission
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
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