She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize