This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
