Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
So much rum. So many feels.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
