Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Too much gin, very little bucket
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Randomize
