So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Randomize
