Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?Â
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
