About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
