I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
