508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize
