Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize