I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I just got carded by a ten year old.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize