i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Do vagina's smell?
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
