Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
