I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Randomize
