lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
