An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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