This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize
