Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
The beer is more important than you right now.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
