She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
