she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I look better un-naked...
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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