Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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