OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
im having a threesome with these popsicles
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Randomize
