We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Randomize
