ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
