You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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