i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
