problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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