i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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