i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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