the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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