yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize