He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
