i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
