Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize