Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I just googled if crying burns calories
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
