ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
