I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
