And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize