I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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