:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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